While playing, this is what I look like to myself. I disappear into the music. It is the freedom and joy of being totally absorbed in intuiting how to blend perfectly in spirit and timing. Harmonious notes sounding with the ease of breathing.
At 60, I picked up a beautifully made La Patríe "Collection" acoustic nylon string guitar (thank you small Canadian village of La Patríe). I persisted for 5 years to work my way through Fredrick Noad's guitar lessons. I could then read music and finger-pick and chord.
I went to Meet Up guitar sessions locally but they lapsed into mostly country or bluegrass. I am interested in Jazz. There is a diminishing group of jazz enthusiasts. I considered starting my own group but then one sees how difficult it is to arrange meetings and find a time when others have the same feeling for a piece. I realized that I didn't need to do this and deal with moods and travel. There is a collaborative website that allows sharing of tracks and talents from anywhere all of the time: Kompoz.com. I have been a member since 2013.
As of June 2019 (now at 73), I have made 73 Collaborations, Joined 102 and Uploaded 533 tracks. I have been privileged to work with professional musicians with similar tastes in music.
I decided to try blowing flute for some way to sustain notes other than using electric guitar (which is what most use). The student flute only cost about $200 and it took a frustrating week to make a sustained solid sounding note on it. I decided to just depend on my brain to rewrite my responses to produce the desired notes upon listening to a song. I just turned to some of my favorite jazz songs on Pandora and played a random set for flute learning. Within a year I could confidently come in anywhere in a song without thinking about what note to play--just by ear. Now I have a list of over 600 favorites in Pandora that I play to for practice and pleasure. So when it comes to adding a track on Kompoz, it feels like a joy to join and harmonize. My rewiring has worked better than imagined and allows complete freedom from thinking about music classically in scores. I don't perform, I share freely.
Likewise with my music. IF any song can bring about a moment's joy in others it is worth more than money.